Loopy, Lonely and Lost

Posts Tagged ‘growing up

Everybody has their moment of great opportunity in ife. If you happen to miss the one you care about, then everything else in life becomes eerily easy.

– Mostly Harmless, Douglas Adams.


This isn’t how it was supposed to be.

All children laugh when grown-ups say “these are the best times of your life”. Nobody wants to believe that that’s it – that predictable routine, acne and over-seriousness are the notable traits of the period of your life you’ll long for one day.

But the truth is that all the good things in my life happened before my eighteenth birthday. Read the rest of this entry »

I can’t stop thinking about the person I used to be.

I know it’s stupid, and not particularly helpful. Maybe if I could forget what it was like to be happy then I could learn to accept that this is all there is now. But I hold on, so desperately, to these memories, because they are all I have left of my life. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve changed, so much. Is it possible to de-age? Is it possible to lose sense, to lose reason?

Read the rest of this entry »


Posted on: August 9, 2009

It’s the early hours of the morning, making me officially 21 years old.

Hurray. Read the rest of this entry »

I feel so grumpy. Just generally irritable and pissed off.

I stayed away from people all day because I knew I’d probably end up being a bitch to them. Read the rest of this entry »


Posted on: January 27, 2009

The silence and emptiness and blankness of the past few days have broken.

I want them back. I want a barrier between me and this. I fucking hate it.

I’m just sitting and hiding and crying. I feel like such an idiot. Read the rest of this entry »


My name is Laura. I was once told that I have cyclothymia. This blog is mostly where I write about living as a person with extremes and instability of mood, and the history of a life that led to the development of those symptoms.

I complain a lot, I'm very repetitive, unreliable, and I tend to contradict myself.

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June 2020